10/9 - How To Write A Christmas Hit

Slade. Wizzard. Wham!

When it comes to Christmas songs, we know what we like, and we like what we know.

But is there a magical formula to writing a festive hit? Can a novice, armed with the right chords, instruments and lyrical motifs, unlock the secret to cracking the Christmas charts?

Last year, our very own Ollie Peart attempted to give it a go. This is his story…

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Including footage never previously broadcast, in this feature-length documentary Olly Mann tracks Ollie’s journey, as he consults music journalist Chris Lochery and songwriter Philippe-Marc Anquetil to discover the role of ‘freewriting’, the significance of writing in a major key, and the importance of ‘finding the line’.

The Sounds Of Christmas was released in December 2018 - but we’ve never announced its final chart position, or revealed how much money it made for charity, until now.

There’s also a BRAND NEW 2019 MIX OF THE SONG for you to buy.

As before, Ollie’s share of the publishing rights, and every penny of artist royalties, go to Samuel’s Charity. Get it HERE.

Samuel's Charity work with underfunded children's wards in the UK to provide support and comfort to families. From supplying decent meals and internet access, to medical kit that makes children's live that much more comfortable, Samuel's Charity makes a positive difference to hundreds of family's lives at a very stressful time.

If, after hearing Olly meet Samuel’s dad, Martin, you’d like to make the charity a festive donation, please do so HERE.

Big thanks to all the podcasters who gave their time and participated in the song, including: The Guilty Feminist, The Two Shot Podcast, Do The Right Thing, Answer Me This!, Wannabe, The Tip Off, The Comedian’s Comedian, The Beef and Dairy Network, Fun Kids Radio, and For F1’s Sake.

Remember, this whole mad enterprise began when Jim Taylor, occasional member of Reverend And The Makers, sent Ollie a challenge by filling in our Feedback form. If YOU have an idea of a trend for Ollie to investigate in our next season of The Modern Mann, contact us now!

Here’s the video Ollie made for the song, featuring Mann-fans from around the world:

We’ll be back with a brand new episode on Wednesday, January 1st 2020. Until then… Happy Christmas!

This episode is supported by Beer52.com - the UK’s No.1 beer club. Mannfans can claim a FREE case of beer, worth £24 at beer52.com/mann. 

10/8 - Christmas Spectacular 2019!

The legendary Foxhole XXXMas Quiz is the high-voltage highlight of our 2019 festive special, as Olly, Alix and Ollie gather round the Yuletide fire with special guest JC Stewart, some VR headsets and a crate of beer…

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Alix Fox, Olly Mann, JC Stewart and Ollie Peart getting festive, Dec 2019

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This is what erotic looks like.

Alix has outdone herself this year, with cheeky games involving gin and tonic lubricant, a haunted Fleshlight, and a harrowing round of ‘Squirtual Reality’.

Meanwhile, in the Zeitgeist, Ollie reveals exactly how much money he can make pimping out his services on Fiverr, and investigates the trend for video-game coaching. 

Our record of the month, performed live under the mistletoe by JC Stewart, is ‘The Wrong Ones’, out now.

We’ll be back to normal service on Jan 1 (with a special bonus Xmas episode on Dec 16).

Until then, a very HAPPY CHRISTMAS to all the Mann-fans, everywhere. This one’s for you.

This episode is brought to you in association with Beer52, the UK’s No.1 craft beer club. Claim your free case of beer NOW at beer52.com/mann.

9/9 - Christmas in the Vicarage

Olly heads to St Andrew’s Church, Islington, to meet Reverend Jessica Swift, an inner-city vicar managing a diverse congregation; some reliant on food banks, others living in million-pound homes.

As she explains, for the modern-day parish clergy, the Christmas season is as much about meetings and bookkeeping as it is mistletoe and wine.

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Meanwhile, it’s Christmasssss!... well, nearly: so time is running out for our charity single, ‘The Sounds of Christmas’, to crack the UK festive Top 40. In this week’s Zeitgeist, Ollie Peart reveals the surprise celebrity friends who’ve added their weight to the campaign, whilst a generous Mann-fan blows our fundraising target out of the water.

Elsewhere, in our very festive Foxhole, Alix Fox welcomes Ollie and Olly to sample some Lovehoney crackers, play a round of ‘Bango’, and a memorable game of ‘What’s That Smell?’ You’ll never look at a bag of popcorn in the same way again.

Finally, our Record of the Week is a certain song by Podcast All-Stars called ‘The Sounds of Christmas’. You can and should support Samuel’s Charity by buying it now.

And HERE’s the video - lip-synched by Mannfans from around the world:

We’ll be back in the first week of January (with our annual How To Be A Dad episode) - but, until then, Happy Holidays to all Mann-fans, everywhere!

3/9 - Mr Panto

Hollywood stars, regional theatres and slapstick comedy - how to make the perfect Panto 

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Eric Potts and John Thomson in Aladdin at the Manchester Opera House

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Olly Mann and Eric Potts

Pantomime: the most peculiarly British of festive entertainments.

Each year, we Brits gather the family together to watch the same old stories. To cheer at the hero, hiss at the baddies, and watch a bloke in drag doing the same call-and-response routines that have enraptured crowds since the days of music hall. Why? 

Eric Potts is a maestro of the genre. As head writer for First Family Entertainments, he churns out ten panto scripts per year, and even finds time to play the Dame in one of them (this year, Aladdin in Manchester)

In this insightful interview with Olly, he explains why super-producers have duopolized the industry, how they persuade Hollywood stars to come over and tread the boards (it’s not just the money...), and why the key to panto success is not tradition or nostalgia - but ADVENTURE.

(Oh Yes It Is!)

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Also this week: Ollie Peart uses his Instagram account as an experiment in automation, and, after an extended Super Mario Run session, offers up one-handed gaming to The Zeitgeist. Plus, why the pen-and-paper notebook just might be a thing of the past.

And - jingle your balls! - Alix Fox finishes us off with a festive Foxhole for all the Modern Mann family. You’ll learn about ‘the Smith’s Salt N Shake of condoms’, why you should ‘get lusty with leftovers’, and how ‘sex Bisto’ might change your bedroom in a very special XXXmas edition of Alix’s favourite party game, ‘Tip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah!’. The Foxhole is proudly sponsored by our friends at MyCondom.Com - use the discount code ‘FOXHOLE’ to get 15% OFF at Checkout.

Finally, Christmas just wouldn’t be Christmas without a good sing-a-long, so do wrap your ears around our song of the week, ‘Honest’, by Martha Gunn. 

And remember, in this time of goodwill to all Mann, that we are always thrilled to receive your monies in exchange for this humble podcast offering. If you’d like to donate, we’d be ever so grateful, guv. Just click Beer Money.

Merry Christmas one and all - we’ll see you straight after the holidays, for our season finale!

1/9 - Being Santa Claus

It's beginning to sound a lot like Christmas.

What's it like being Santa Claus? In our Christmas Spectacular episode, Olly meets actor Nigel Harvey, who makes a living playing Father Christmas all year round - and hears about the highs and lows of life inside the iconic red-and-white outfit. 

Meanwhile, at the invitation of listener Paul from delicious ice cream cafe Cloud 9, the rest of the team have decamped to Brighton, where Ollie Peart considers Tim Peake's Christmas in space, and Alix Fox presents us with her Christmas-wrapped selection of the year's best sex toys*. Ding dong!

Olly meets Nigel Harvey, aka Celebrity Santa

The Modern Mann team decamp to Brighton. It's Winter, you know. Mum always says to bring your scarf, and your vibrator.

Alix, OIlie, and Ollie sample a delicious Cloud 9 cake with our ACTUAL FACES on it!

That Cloud 9 Manncake in all its glory. #Manncake

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* In case you're keen to try them out, Alix's 2015 pick of the sex toys (SPOILER ALERT!) were: The Womaniser 'sucking' clitoral stimulator from Sh! emporium; The Lester heat-up vibrator by Svakom; The Motorhead Ace of Spades vibrator from Lovehoney, and fizzy cola-flavoured condoms by Pasante. 

It's a hell of a show, but we've still got one more episode left in us before this series is done - we'll see you for the 'season finale' - when else, but next Tuesday. 

Have a very, very happy Christmas. And, if Santa ends up giving you loads of money and you don't know what to do with it, do consider buying us a beer, won't you? Thanks.